Well, if you ever wanted to see if we can play a show without swearing, Thursday is your chance. Somehow we got suckered into playing something called the Petunia festival in Dixon Illinois.
Even the name sounds lame. I think were just gonna bring an ipod with George Carlins 7 words you can't say and play that.
should be an easy load in and out.

Subway sandwiches can really make you ill. Tony found this out on the way up to Eau Claire. After stopping for gas, Tony rushed into the bathroom to expell what the catholic church would call "his demons." I paid for gas, shopped for kitchy trucker shirts, and finally went to the gentlemens room to releave myself. I saddled up to the head and could hear Tony heaving violently in the adjacent stall. After quietly laughing to myself, I heard him moan agonizingly "When did I eat corn?" ... "When did    I   eat  corn?"

So Shaun from Eagons Unicats can't do some shows with us because as a drama major at some shithole community college, he has to play a mute chinese woman that folds laundry in some Tennesee Williams play. So we fooled him into drinking a couple of sips of Tonys sweet, sweet urine. To which he sourly replied " this beers warm as piss!" which I replied "really?"
End of story.
Enjoy

  So another year went by with no grammy. Not even a nomination. It's getting harder and harder to do this without some sort of validation like a trophy. I mean why else would we do this? 
   So some "dude" asked me if i really thought that everyone who played Guitar Hero was a faggot. I said "Yes." He said "So you're callin' me a faggot?" I replied "Apparently so." He puffs up his chest and barks out "Do you wrestle?" I said "Not with men, and No, I dont play wrestling video games either." He told me to "fuck off" So I did and there ya go'.